I have been thinking about that black cat and how she still holds some piece of my mind.
I don’t like it one bit.
There is many reasons for it the obvious one being everyone I’ve ever been involved or tried to be involved with turned out to be an asshole.
Except one where I was an asshole, it was in year 3 to four back home and I had not yet deveopt any independent thought as I was taking my cousins advice and one of them said or somewhere along the lines( I was a late school starter) that if anyone bothers you hit them and I didn’t do that I stabbed her with my pencil. And then in year four I developed feelings I didn’t realize what were until now and before the school’s term could finish the war eruppted. We left.
Never seen or heard anything about her again. Its been 25 years probably more.
Back to the cat.
I should see others or at least sleep around where ever available just like her, however my shyness holds me back and I’ve only gotten as far as getting one persons number and then she played hard ball.
I still think and wonder how it could have been but I also am very grateful that it never was with her as she turned out to be a, well much more of psychopath than me, she still stalks me.